Motherhood… Career… Can you have both? Do you want both? Let’s talk about choices today. What do you want your life path choice to look like? What are the options? What should be considered? And maybe I’ll just step up onto the soapbox for a hot minute…
Having kids in college really makes a person think about career choices. The truth is that just as we are approaching the end of the first quarter of our life, we are expected to make some type of choice about a career.
What do you want to do with the rest of your life?
How do you want to spend the majority of your awake time? At a desk? Outside? Inside? With people? Managing people? With numbers? With money? Snuggling babies? Working with your hands? With customers? Convincing people? Helping people? Debating ideas? Creating ideas? Creating art, music, design? Make a choice and make it right now.
Make a choice and make it right now.
And oh, by the way, be prepared to stand by that choice for the better part of the next half-century.
On top of this pressure, the whole parenting thing comes into play. Did your parents assume that college and career were the only choices for you? Were you destined to take over the family business? Was college completely out of the question? Was self-employment valued by your parents? Was motherhood valued by your parents? Did your parents encourage you to follow your dreams? What exactly did your parents value? And so on and so on and so on…
At a smidge over 50, I ponder these things. Careers are a huge part of life, for both men and women. As parents, we want to make sure that our adult children choose wisely, right?
In my opinion, the purpose of a career is to support yourself, your future family, to support your life!
Let’s dissect this one a bit. For me, the truth is that my “career” has been as a wife and mother. I have had a multitude of jobs, but none of them have supported my family like being a wife and mother have.
I think that is the kicker. Too often the meaning of “supporting a family” comes down to dollars when money is only one piece of the support needed in a family.
According to dictionary.com: Support
- Give assistance to, especially financially; enable to function or act
- provide with a home and the necessities of life
- give approval, comfort, or encouragement to
Even today I sometimes find myself thinking, I should really have some type of career. If only I earned “X” amount of dollars, my “career” would have meaning and importance. I mean what have I really done with my life?
Seriously? What kind of negative self-talk is that? My “career” is important! Being a wife is important! Being a mom is important!
Motherhood is my life path.
Every time I second guess the importance of my career choice and take on more work or seek out a more “important”, “career-like”, “real” job, my real life suffers.
If I’m too busy working, I can’t do the many things the Warriors and Big Jon have counted on for the past 25 years. Silly things like picking up the dry cleaning and learning how to take care of the pool or bigger things like listening and advising.
I’m certainly not saying this is the only way. I’m just saying it’s MY way and it’s MY career choice and it works for us.
And what I really want you to hear is that there is VALUE in marriage and motherhood as a career choice. Just as much value as if you choose to be a plumber or a lawyer or a beautician or whatever.There is VALUE in marriage and motherhood as a career choice Click To Tweet
There is value in education and college and masters programs. You can choose to get a Ph.D. and then choose motherhood and that is perfectly OK. You have NOT wasted money on an education and you are NOT wasting your education on motherhood.
And guess what? You can change your mind! You might think being a full-time wife and mom is what you want and then at 30 decide that you want to learn graphic design or engineering. Or you might think being a teacher or retail store manager is your thing and then become a mother and want to chuck it all and stay home with your child. That is OK too.
Please hear me, as I might be the only one in the world who will tell you this. You get to choose and there is no wrong choice! You live in the United States of America where praise God, we are able to make our own life plan choice.
And if your choice doesn’t work out, you can choose again.
And again.You get to choose your life path and there is no wrong choice! Click To Tweet
So sorry for the bit of a rant, but once I get thinking, well…
Let me now step off of the soap box and let you ponder these thoughts. Thanks, as always, for sticking with me. You will never realize how much I appreciate you.