You deserve to be cherished.
You. With all of your bumps, bruises, mistakes, dramas, craziness, whatever.
You. With the really bad ex, the really bad decision you made last week, the really bad choice you’re going to make next week.
You deserve to be cherished. Do NOT settle for anything less.
I have the great blessing of working with many young men and women, mostly millennials, in my day job. Personally, I am happy to call many of them friends 🙂 (although they may call me the old lady that they work with…Or just consider me another version of Mom…)
Regardless, I am thankful for the opportunity to get to know each and every one of them, and I take the words they share with me very seriously.
Recently, a couple of beautiful girls and I were chatting about boyfriends and breakups and I felt led to encourage them. So I said,
“You are fabulous. You are worthy. You deserve to be cherished.”
Cherished. It’s a word we really don’t use often these days. It sounds a little old-fashioned, right? I mean, it makes me think of that old song by the Association.
What does Cherish really mean tho?
When in doubt, I say google it. According to Dictionary.com cherish means:
- to hold or treat as dear; feel love for
- to care for tenderly; nurture
- to cling fondly or inveterately to
Usually when I am seeking a definition for a word, only one of the options applies to the given situation. But here is where the English language surprises us. When talking about deserving to be cherished in a relationship, it appears that not one but all of the definitions apply.
You deserve to be held or treated as dear; to be loved.You deserve to be held or treated as dear; to be loved. Click To Tweet
You are special. You are important. You are not an object, or a conquest to be had. Your thoughts, your decisions, your body are to be respected and loved. I’m not sure exactly when the third date rule became the norm instead of the exception, but let me just say there is no rule. There is nothing to prove and sex certainly doesn’t prove anything anyway. You deserve to be treated as dear (which, by the way, means beloved, another awesome word) You deserve to be cherished.
You deserve to be cared for; nurtured.You deserve to be cared for; nurtured. Click To Tweet
Ideally, this would begin with your parents. Sometimes, however, it doesn’t happen. Let’s face it, we all have stuff. Call it baggage, call it history, call it dysfunction, call it whatever you like. We all have it, in one way or another. But let’s talk about those of us who didn’t and/or don’t get this type of nurturing from our moms or dads.
Truth is, if we didn’t get this type of nurturing at home, we will seek it elsewhere. Our human emotion craves to be nurtured and cared for. It just does.
Once again, per dictionary.com nurture means:
- to feed and protect: to nurture one’s offspring.
- to support and encourage, as during the period of training or development; foster: to nurture promising musicians
- to bring up; train; educate
Many people have turned to the opposite sex seeking to be cherished in this way. Truth is, sex is not nurturing. It may make you feel cared for briefly, but it will not quench that part of your soul that desires to be nurtured.
But let me say this. There are a lot of people out there who care and are willing to care for you and nurture you. Relatives, grandparents, friend’s parents, maybe even the old lady you work with. There are many of us who are willing to care for you, protect you, support and encourage you, mentor you, even feed you. 🙂
And one day, when you are in a loving, committed relationship with someone who cherishes you, that person will also be there to care for and nurture you. That is part of the whole cherishing thing. And you deserve to be cherished.
You deserve to be clung to fondly or inveterately.You deserve to be clung to fondly or inveterately. Click To Tweet
I freely admit it. I know what fondly means but inveterately was new for me. Back to dictionary.com ( a very handy website!) inveterately means:
- settled or confirmed in a habit, practice, feeling, or the like:
- firmly established by long continuance, as a disease, habit, practice, feeling, etc; chronic
Makes sense right? We are so important to another that we are clung to because they just want to cling to us. The desire to be close is overwhelming and becomes permanent and forever. This is not a relationship that is tenuous and fleeting, but one that is fused together because you are being clung to and you are clinging to another. You deserve to be cherished.You are fabulous. You are worthy. You deserve to be cherished. Click To Tweet
Thanks so much to everyone that chooses to chat with me and share their lives with me. I truly care about each and every one of you. I am here for you and remember. You deserve to be cherished.